So you’re feeling stressed, exhausted and overwhelmed, some days all at once and no matter how much you try to do all the ‘right’ things: rest, eat well, prioritize with lists and organization, exercise, take a long weekend away, relax in the evenings with a glass of wine and chick flick or series on Netflix (or Foxtel, BritBox etc etc), delegate cooking dinner and the kids’ bedtime routine to your partner or even a babysitter regularly…you just can’t seem to get a grip on this game called Life.
The problem, beautiful soul, is not in the ‘things’ you are doing or that you are doing anything wrong or even more so – that there is anything wrong with YOU! No, no and NO!
The problem, in my humble opinion, is simply in this: the DOING. And more so, the doing of the many, many things we have been made to believe we are ‘required’ to take responsibility for because they are ‘our’ responsibility as humans. Add to that, the societal expectations that we have been indoctrinated with over generations, especially if you identify as a woman, that you must put everyone else’s needs before your own, that self-sacrifice is therefore a given and most of all that you’d better not (unless you want to be judged and even ridiculed) think you deserve better or different for yourself. This is your lot in life and you’d better just bloody well accept it and the misery that goes with the stress, exhaustion and overwhelm.
If you identify as a ‘good girl’ like I did, this burden becomes even more heavy to bear over time because you are always reliable and relied upon, responsible, meet your obligations without question and want to please everyone that matters at all to you or risk rejection and the loss of any kind of ‘positive’ attention or approval from them.
PHEW! I’m exhausted just documenting this diatribe of absolute bullshit!
Why?
Because, thank the universe, I no longer identify with these stories that had be playing small and nearly broke me into a million pieces, left me depressed and anxious and wondering who the hell I even was anymore.
Oh sweet and beautiful, tired souls. I do not want this for you.
I want to see you liberated and at ease, living your lives joyfully and with grace for yourselves at every turn.
You are so exquisite! Yet I see you, crawling exhausted into bed and then some nights unable to shut down the mind chatter and finally succumbing to some kind of sleep only to wake distressed that you must return to your life, the constant groundhog days and do it all again.
What if I could assure you that there is another way? That I have found it and that I would love to see you find it too?
What if you actually knew how to find it for yourself but just need a little bit of peace and quiet to hear yourself think!? Or to silence the inner critic and the multitude of thoughts resonating through your mind telling you all things you still haven’t got done today?
How would it feel to hear from someone who’s been there and is now enjoying a life of freedom, joy, ease and grace? Someone who’s love for you is boundless and who is willing (despite all her imperfections, fears and doubts) to get real with you and break through all the noise, confusion and self-help information to share simple, gentle and expansive ways for you to just feel a little better day by day?
Well, I’m not saying I have all the answers or that I can even begin to know what you, precious one are going through right at this moment. What I can say is that you’re not alone and that I am willing to listen, to hear you and to share from my lived experience of overwhelm, exhaustion, chronic stress and pain, adrenal fatigue, anxiety and depression – so that you may experience less of all those things.
Let’s get back to the problems of feeling stressed, exhausted and overwhelmed.
I like to address the issues we face by asking questions. Questions for you to consider and then answer for yourself so you can identify your unique path to better wellbeing and feeling more like your beautiful self again.
Could it be that the stress, exhaustion and overwhelm are tied to all the DOING you are doing? Never mind the underlying reasons for WHY you are doing all the doing for now. Just that you are and if you stop and make a list of all the things you do and the mental list always at the edge of your awareness of things you still think you must do and then beat yourself up for not having done yet – you will find it is ENDLESS.
So, I invite you to simply STOP!
Be a rebel. Fight for your life and your wellbeing and just bloody STOP! Who said you had to DO all things you think you have to do anyway? Can you identify them?
Could it be, that if you were to identify them, you could tell them to F*&^ off? That you are tired and you don’t want to play this game anymore?
So, again, I say do it and STOP.
I encourage you, implore you to get consequent and start culling your daily ‘To Do’ list. Who is in control of it? Who’s job is it to decide what you get ‘done’ each and every day?
Yep, you said it. I heard you. It is your job.
So, take back your power and do LESS or better yet replace some of the items on your list with things you really want to do. Things that will make you feel better.
Might you be able to just have a rest? Do nothing or only what you feel you have the energy for today? Would your world end?
It might surprise you to find that the things that really doing will still get done. Whether by you or someone else in your household (yep, just quietly they could all share the load a little more and lend a hand. I am certain that they are more than capable and taking on some things might just grow their life skills and confidence to care for themselves).
How do we combat stress, exhaustion and overwhelm?
We begin to consider them, examine them and ask ourselves some key questions!
What is causing me the most stress today? What is making me feel so exhausted? What is it that sends me into overwhelm – when I am just not sure I can cope anymore?
Grab a journal or pen and paper of any kind, or your phone/tablet/computer and get really real and honest with yourself and start answering these questions.
If the answers send you spinning and spiral then reach out to me for help. I am here to lovingly, gently but firmly support you to find your way out of this. To return to a place where you can use your own inner wisdom and capacity to create a path out of these issues that are sucking the life force out of you. You will return to a place of feeling back in charge of your own days.
I always offer a free, hour long, Strategy Session for you to begin to identify your path to more contentment and personal freedom. Please feel free to use me as a resource. When you do, if you find it helpful, you can also lock in 3-5 30 minute ‘Taster’ Coaching sessions with me to get a feel for coaching and decide if you find it useful. There is no obligation to keep working with me but the option is there if you want it.
I have a vision of you smiling, at ease and enjoying your life with energy to spare at the end of each day. I see your head, gently dropping on to your pillow at night and you sighing and giving a gentle smile of contentment as you drift off to sleep, in gratitude for your beautiful life.
Are you willing to reach for that? Please reach out and let me know.
To your Wellbeing always,
Katrin
Your Wellbeing Matters Coaching 